The Christmas Spirit

12/24/09
This time of year, it's popular -- and, in my opinion, pointless -- to complain that people are only being nice to one another because it's Christmas time. You hear, "I'll be glad when Christmas is over so people can act like themselves again.” And, "Why do people have to wait 'til Christmas to be nice to each other? It won't last."

So what if we suspend reality for a few days or weeks around Christmas? The good feelings that are exchanged among co-workers; the easing up of hostilities among neighbors; the rediscovered warmth among family members; the smiles (and eye contact!) between strangers; the attention we give each other; the surprises -- offered and received -- that tickle us; the uninterrupted laughing; the staying up late; the airport runs to pick up those coming home; the get-togethers with best pals; all this confirms our humanity and our human kindness. It makes our hearts stronger and our spirits more like Christ's.

All this gives us the fuel and assurance to move on through our days of haste and drudge and deadlines; and we excitedly look toward the same time next year when we can open ourselves up again and let our guard down, knowing we won't be the only ones. Day-to-day life is unpredictable. So, yes, we need a little -- a whole lot of -- Christmas!

Miss America

Underneath all of the
who they think you are,
them rolling their eyes and
calling you Miss America,
shaking their heads, saying,
"In that mirror again."

Just because you
like to try
out the Avon samples,
like to paint your face with the new
shadows and blushes and glosses,
like to play Cover Girl.

Underneath is something more.
They call you vain,
but insecurity grips.
You wish you were a pretty girl.

Could your nose be smaller,
your skin smoother?

When I meet Jermaine Jackson,
will he think I’m cute?

Then I see a picture
of Hazel Gordy.
He marries her.

Pretty girls are everywhere.
Insecurity lingers,
and Janis Ian sings
about the ones
with clear-skin smiles.

Until you start to like who you are.

Underneath, you are a performer
and the world’s your stage,
or the living room is.

You catwalk across
the bedroom,
a drama queen.
Can try out three hairstyles
during “Law and Order,”
wearing Fashion Fair’s
new red on your lips.
Or Vaseline.

You take helpful hints
from Tyra and the guest judges,
turn your good side to the lens
when there are cameras flashing,
even though your sister smirks:
"Phony!"

Insecurity hovers.

Back in the mirror,
you shrug it off.

Everyone needs
a survival plan.

What I Now Know

I’m glad I have been loved,
and hurt by someone
who loves me.
Or else I might not know
how to forgive,
how to love anyway,
love in spite of,
love through,
love again,
love me,
love like
I am loved.

How to get back up,
open my arms,
hold close,
be held.

How to make a
sad-eyed child smile.

How to wait,
listen,
to the music,
the words.

How to be gentle.